White Underwear?

pants

I’ve never understood white underwear. You see all the adverts on TV and the guy on the front of underwear packets wearing a nice crisp pair of white boxers or pants. They should show a rear view of him with brown streaks on the pants too in order to portray the complete picture of what you’re about to get yourself into.

Thinking aloud here but why in the fuck would any man want to wear WHITE underwear. I can apply this to the context of the gym here but even for everyday life I can’t think of damn thing more dangerous than white underwear.

Should I accidently shit myself or rip one of those farts out that leaves a skid the last thing I want to do is advertise this by wearing white underwear. There is no hiding it. You’re getting changed in the locker room, or you’ve finished PE at school, or you imagine any endeavour in your life where you need to publicly take your trousers off and there is that nightmare moment when you’re parading around in your underwear and its blatantly apparent you’ve shit yourself or have skids. That’s not going to be a good thing for any man.

Now the gym. You may know the feeling and straining for that last rep on squats or deadlifts. The risk of following through or a wet fart is far too high here to run the risk of white underwear, so I advise against wearing white underwear especially in the gym or doing some sort of sport.

My advice to anyone is to not bother with white underwear, it just isn’t worth the risk!

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New Year, new you? The 1 month club

I hate New Year’s resolutions for 2 reasons.

  1. New Year’s resolutions seem so gimmicky and pointless. Everyone makes them and mostly everyone fails to stick to them.
  1. They make my gym a breeding ground for the ‘1 month club’ member, as I like to put it. Gyms around the country are full of people who only use their membership for one month before simply giving up. Are you of them? Or do you know someone like this?

What is the problem with New Year’s resolutions?

Well there is nothing wrong with having good intentions, changing your lifestyle, self, job or personality for the better of yourself, others around you and for mankind. I think most people also have a New Year’s resolution because they know it doesn’t matter if they don’t see it through. I just don’t get why it must happen on the 1st of January either.

If you use this practice in everyday life situations you’ll probably agree it seems ridiculous. Let’s use a couple of examples….

Example 1-

Your car has a problem with the engine, do you get it fixed which saves much hassle, money and stress later on and resolve the issue by nipping it in the bud? Or do you ignore it and think to add it to your list of ‘New Year’s’ resolutions?

Example 2-

A certain aspect of your character is causing destructive damage to your relationships with the people in your house and the work place. Is it best to decide to change and address this issue once it is brought to your attention or ignore it and then half-heartedly add it as a New Year’s resolution?

You get where I’m going. Essentially any time in the year is as good a time as any to make any positive changes to your life. This applies to all facets of your life be it work, health, relationships, parenting, mind-set, diet, health and training. Don’t make a resolution in January, make it when an issue comes to light or when you want to make a change. Don’t bury your head in the proverbial sand and ignore things, grab the bull by the bollocks and take it for a ride.

Back to training, diet and health

So you’ve been seeing the scales move the wrong way for a while, you feel like dog shit warmed up, you’re unimpressed by your apparently lack of motivation to train and eat well and you’re turning into a fat fuck? Well don’t decide that you’ll do it in January. Seize the day and do it, do it now!

There is no moment like the present, you need to be an adult and admit you’re not happy with something and then go about rectifying the issue. Again this applies to all facets of your life.

Where to start

Recognition that you want to make a change in your life is the first step. I would then suggest you write down your goals in black and white, make them realistic too. Pin this piece paper to your diary, work station or mirror at home. Fitness goals can be to add size, strength, loose body fat, compete in a show, do a strongman comp or better your athletic performance in your chosen sport. Make these goals measurable- How strong do you want to be, what position do you want in your next competition?

Next you need to arm yourself with the correct and relevant information to give you the best chance of making your goals happen. In terms of bettering your physique you need to read, research and look at scientific studies and books. Also if you can find a decent PT (good luck) consult with him or her and make a plan to set you up for success. Study diet options and buy in the food you need to make it easier.

Make adjustments over time. Don’t be dogmatic in your approach. Take new ideas on board. If certain things are not working for you then change them for example.

The definition of madness is trying the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome”-Einstein

Will power

Something few people have, such as immense wealth, a perfect character or great physique does not come over night. It requires great mental strength in the long term. You may hit a plateau, you may have life situations that stand in your way or stressful times that test your will power. Are you going to just fold and give in? “oh it was too hard so….…” so what? You just jacked in like a giant vagina and gave up?!

See it through, after a time the changes you made to your lifestyle that seemed tough will be standard and you’ll just be riding the wave.

On a personal level this year is going to be pretty tough for me, with health issues and other stuff going on its going to get tough. But fuck it, I’ll meet any adversity head on and not let it destroy what I’m trying to do in general with my physique or my life. Don’t be the dog that rolls over and dies, be the dog that bites back.

Final thought

Don’t be one of these people that buys a 12 month gym membership and uses it for 30 days, act now and start to focus on your health and fitness goals. I guarantee once you start seeing the progress you’ll pick up momentum and gain the ability to carry the mind-set you’ve acquired over into other areas of your life. Apply some of the principles outlined above and don’t hang around waiting for a magic time of the year to start them.